Bite Size Transformation
I turned 50 since I last wrote. 50, folks! I’ve also kept a journal since I was 10. A bit ago I re-read my New Year’s Eve entry from when I was 17. 1986. :) And after reading it, I immediately called one of my most reasonable friends, lamenting and locked in self-judgment over how similar my resolutions were then ~ to NOW!!!!
She just laughed and said that’s normal ~ that without great effort to change, we all often stay entrenched in lifetime habits and belief systems. To further reinforce her point she told me that her mother-in-law had recently shown her her husband’s Teacher’s Assessment from 3rd grade ~ and confirmed that she would write a very similar review currently for him as her husband. :)
So yes, to some degree we are all our own special little personalities with our own quirks and skills and perceived shortcomings ~ but we are also literally constantly evolving. Cellular regeneration occurs in a myriad of ways as your body regrows and starts anew all the time. And within our magical brains, neuroplasticity is a constant, which is the brain's ability to reorganize itself by forming new neural connections throughout life. If you’d like to read a bit more about this incredible process, read Pathways to a Happier You to see how you can harness it for yourself.
In a nutshell…
we all have a fairly endless capacity to change any number of things about ourselves. Truly the fundamental piece of any transformative change is the desire to want that change. To want it strongly enough to refute any reasons your defensive comfort-loving brain will concoct to try to keep you from making changes.
So get to thinking. What do you actually want to change? It could be something big or something very small. I want you to really zone in and think of 1 or 2 things that you often think of changing. That you “wish” you could improve upon.
And speaking of “wish” I recently saw a talk by Abraham Hicks about the use of “wish”, “should”, and “but”. She bans these words from being used by any of her clients ~ and deconstructs their underlying implicit messages. She said that the universe interprets these concepts as weak and an indicator of a lack of faith. Think about it ~ if you are 'wishing" or "hoping" it implies that you do not have faith in the outcomes of your desires, that you feel like you need to employ some random "magic" instead of acknowledging that your own beliefs and actions are the only true determining factors in transformation.
Now back to your instrument of change ~
that magical in-need-of-harnessing mind of yours!
Focus on one thing that you’d like to prove your personal powers for change on first. Write down 3 words about how you feel about it now. Then write down three words about how you WANT to feel about it. Next free write for 3-5 minutes about all of your thoughts on the subject.
For instance, if I chose to read more and Netflix less, I could currently say that when I watch tv instead of reading, I feel Lazy, Typical, and Disengaged. And I want to feel Inspired, Motivated, and Committed to Evolving.
Then think of what your “reward” will be. This part is critical. Whether we want to admit it or not, as humans we need incentives to maintain our new behaviors ~ otherwise it is too easy to slip back into what is familiar and requires less effort. So think of what you will “reward” yourself with ~ anything! From listening to your favorite song to looking at a picture of how you envision your future life or even 5 extra minutes in the shower ~. Anything that links your new action to something that gives you pleasure and reminds you how much you want to make this change.
Over the next months we’re going to be sharing a lot with you about creating mini-challenges for personal change. A few months ago, I challenged myself to 30 days of No Sugar, and I honestly wasn't sure that I’d ever gone even 30 hours without sugar in the last 45 years! In the beginning I wasn’t sure if I could do it at all, and I was super skeptical about it having lasting results. Then we all got to bear witness to me literally changing my neural pathways in regards to my sugar habit. I’m the oldest of us, so theoretically have the most ingrained patterns. And I truly feel like if I can do it, at 50, then I’m happy to be the guinea pig to show that we can ALL change things anytime we commit to doing so. So as a group we’ve all been creating our own challenges for change and are getting so much out of them that we want to share their simple yet limitless potential with you too.
about your starting focus. Then choose the action that you will do daily ~ first what you will specifically do as your new habit and then what to do for your “reward”. Ideally even keep a record of it ~ every day write at the top of a new page WHY you are changing this behavior and what your desired end goal is ~ and then as much or as little as you want about how it went that day. Accountability works!
We so hope you’ll join us in these next months of exploring change ~ and our own limitless capacity for it. No “wishing”, no “hoping”, no “buts” ~ just some more commitment to your goal and belief in yourself that you CAN do it. One small change. You can do more but there is more potential for brain fatigue if you try to change too much at once. This is definitely a situation of Quality over Quantity because the goal is lasting change, not a quick fix.
And speaking of accountability, we’ll be offering ideas for us to all do together too. The first will be a 10 day just-2-minutes-of-meditation-daily challenge. Every day we’ll be posting guided meditations, led by each of us, for you to easily fit into your day. Join our email list and follow us on Instagram @worthybeyondpurpose to be a part of the fun and transformation. You may well be surprised by what 2 minutes a day can do, and you can also use the time to become intentionally reflective about what changes you want to make.
Start small… and commit! And please know that in the beginning, we’re all swimming upstream together. The good news is that it does get easier, as your new neural muscles for good habit-forming grow stronger. Personally I may have some of the old resolutions lingering about for 2020, but I’m also committed to harnessing the art of
Doing Over Wishing
Taking Action Over Hoping
And NO Buts Allowed.